Thursday, December 22, 2011

Tim Tebow: Why I Can't Stand Him




For all of you who don't know who Tim Tebow is (I doubt that you haven't), he is the starting quarterback for the Denver Broncos. He was also a Heisman trophy winner at the University of Florida. Not only is he well known for his luck on the football field (which was ended by the New England Patriots), but also for his strong Christian beliefs. He has become a nationwide phenomenon. His signature move of taking a knee and praying has become a term in the dictionary called "Tebowing."

Well, I'm sorry, but I can not stand it! I'm not putting down his religious beliefs or any of that. I'm a Christian too. I believe the same things that he does. And I am not denying the fact that he is a great athlete. I think that he has tremendous atheticism. I just hate the fact that he is a quarterback.

Has anyone ever seen the guy try and throw the ball. As I was watching the game against my team, the New England Patriots, I don't think that he threw one tight spiral. Actually, if I remember correctly, I think he threw a few that went end over end, like a kickoff. I'm sorry, but if you can't throw the ball, then you SHOULDN'T BE A QUARTERBACK (Are you listening, Coach Barry?)! I would not be as hating of him if he played another position. If they threw him in as a running back or a tight end, he would be okay in my book. Just NOT AT QUARTERBACK!

Another thing that bugs me about him is that devout Christians think of him as some sort of savior. I work at Christian Book Distributors, and we sell Tebow's biography Through My Eyes. It is a very popular book for customers to order, and every time some crazy Christian orders it, they always have to mention how great they think Tim Tebow is. They treat him like he is Jesus Christ.



 Well, I hate to break it to you crazy Christians, but he is not a savior. He is just a kid who plays football. THAT'S IT!

Another thing that bothers me is that they have given his praying before and after games a new name. They call it "Tebowing." They don't realize that this move already has a name. It's called genuflecting! That's all I have to say about that!

Other than those things, I think that he is great guy. I just can't stand how crazy everyone is getting over this guy. I don't think that there is anything special about him at all.




Tuesday, December 20, 2011

MOVIE REVIEW: The Muppets

So, I have to admit, I absolutely love the muppets! They have always made me laugh ever since I was a kid. I think that these characters are absolutely hilarious. That's why I was so excited when I saw that they were making a new muppet movie! And guess what?  It was EVERYTHING THAT I HAD HOPED FOR!!!

The synopsis of the movie is about two brothers, Gary (Jason Segel) and Walter, who falls in love with the Muppets and The Muppet Show. As they grow older, Gary invites Walter to LA with him and his girlfriend (Amy Adams). When they get to LA, Walter's only ambition is to see the Muppet Studio. When he gets there, it's completely run down. When he stumbles into Kermit's old office, he overhears an oil tycoon's plan to tear down the studio because its over an oil well. When he hears this, he goes to find Kermit to warn him. When he meets Kermit, he tells him everything he heard. They then decide to go and get the gang back together to try and raise $10 million to keep the theatre alive with a show. Come to find out, they are not famous anymore. So putting the show on and raising enough money seems a lot harder than they thought. It's full of a whole bunch of amazing celebrity cameos, including Alan Arkin, NPH, Selena Gomez, The chick from I Love You, Man, Whoopie Goldberg, and many more.

In my opinion, it was the perfect movie. I think this may have been the best movie that I have seen all year. It was perfect! The greatest part about the movie was that it had all of the same old jokes that we all know and love mixed with a modern atmosphere. They managed to come up with an interesting plot that keeps the audience interested. It wasn't a script that was unoriginal or boring. If they tried to do do something that was similar to all of the other movies made before, then it wouldn't have been as great as it was.

Also... RAINBOW CONNECTION!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!



Since this is a movie review, I have to point out at least 1 dissappointing part. If I have to, I would have to say that the only thing that it was missing was Rizzo the Rat. Rizzo has become a serious part of the Muppet cast and crew. In a few of the more recent Muppet movies, he has played a pretty big role in them. He has a lot of great lines in these movies too. In this new Muppets movie, he was almost non-existant. I have to say, I did miss Rizzo in this movie. I wish they had more with him.



All-in-all, The Muppets is an instant classic. I think that this movie was brilliant and perfect in every way! There's probably only a few more weeks of this movie being in theatres, and I STRONGLY suggest that everyone goes and sees it, especially if you love the Muppets.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Top 10 Favorite Christmas Movies

So, even though I really can't stand Christmas music, I do love Christmas movies! There are Christmas movies that are pretty ridiculous, but for the most part, they are all pretty good, especially the older ones. There aren't many newer movies that are quality movies, such as Christmas with the Kranks or Deck the Halls. The older ones are pretty, for lack of a better term, magical.

So, here is the list of my top 10 favorite. Starting from the best:

1.) It's A Wonderful Life



This movie is not only a Christmas classic, but it is also one of the most inspirational movies of all time. George Bailey is the type of character that I constantly compare myself to and sort of strive to be. He always put everything and everyone in front of his own life, and often times not by choice. Throughout the whole movie, you really feel bad for him. He never was able to get away from the small town called Bedford Falls. He never got to do his own thing. When his life seemed down and out, and all he wanted to do was leave this life, he was given the gift of seeing what life would be like in his town if he was never born. You realize that even though he never got to do his own thing in life, his impact in the world was a success, and that, "NO man is a failure who has friends."

2.) A Christmas Story



YOU'LL SHOOT YOUR EYE OUT! Yes, that classic film about a kid and the one gift he wanted for Christmas, the Red Rider BB Gun. Everyone remembers that one gift they always wanted for Christmas. Mine was a football... which was the butt of the joke in this movie. I have to say, I think my favorite character in the film is actually the father, played by late actor Darren McGavin. "SONS OF BITCHES! BUMPUSEEEES!!" I love this movie, and will always watch the 24 hour reruns on Christmas day.

3.) A Christmas Carol



As an actor, I have always wanted to play the role of Ebenezer Scrooge, that cold, heartless old man who needs to try to find the true meaning of Christmas, or he will die cold and alone and live the rest of his eternal life in shackles and chains and tortured to walk the earth for eternity. It is a classic story that has been done with many different styles and actors, even with the Muppets. I have to say I like the 1984 version the best, starring George C. Scott as Ebenezer Scrooge. Although, I think the Muppets come in a really close second.

4.) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation



I think that I like this installment of the Vacation series is probably my favorite of all of them. Everyone loves the crazy, wacky Griswald family, but when the in-laws come for the holidays, the craziness multiplies! This movie has become a holiday favorite in my household. Everyone says that there are a lot of similarities between this family and my family. It's an instant classic.

5.) Elf



Now, I know I said that I don't really like modern Christmas movies, but I think Will Ferrell's hilarious movie is definitely an exception. I think that Will Ferrell is one of the funniest people I have ever seen. That's that!

6.) Prancer



This is one of those not-so-well-known Christmas movies that my dad taped for me when I was a kid. I have watched this movie every year since I was a kid. It's the story of a little girl who befriends a wounded reindeer. She thinks that this wounded reindeer is Prancer, one of Santa's 8 reindeer. Everyone in the town thinks that she is crazy, but she still believes in him, and so he believes in her. If you haven't seen it, I strongly suggest that you do.

7.) Ernest Saves Christmas



Sure, make fun of me if you want, but I really get a kick out of Ernest P. Warrel. Everyone else says that their favorite one of the Ernest movies is actually Ernest Scared Stupid, but my favorite is Ernest Saves Christmas.

8.) Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer



This is a real classic. They play this every year on CBS, and I always need to watch this movie every year. Of all the stupid puppet movies that they have made, this one is probably the best one. It has been a classic in my household ever since I was a little kid, and I can never go a Christmas without seeing it.

9.) Santa Claus: The Movie



No, not The Santa Clause with Tim Allen. This movie stars Dudley Moore and John Lithgow. This is such a great movie. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. In the movie, John Lithgow plays the CEO of a major toy corporation. I actually based my first role of J.B. Biggley in How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying off of this character.

10.) Die Hard



OHHHH YEEEEEEEAAAAAH! YIPPIE KAY-YEY, MOTHER FUCKER!!


So this is the list. Let me know what you think. either facebook comment, comment on the blog itself, or do something with the twitter post. I don't know. Retweet it, I guess.

Friday, December 9, 2011

All I Want For Christmas Is... A NEW F**KING SONG!!!!

That's right. I said it.

If you know me well enough, you know that I am not a fan of Christmas music. Every year, people get so excited whenever Christmas music starts playing on the radio (my own mother included). They play it nonstop here on the Oldies radio station in the Boston area from Black Friday all the way until the New Year. Think about that: All day, nonstop, Christmas music. Not only will you most definitely hear the same song more that once in the entire Christmas season, but you will also definitely hear the same song more that once or twice in a single day. Do you want to know why that happens?

It is because NO ONE has written a new Christmas song in 20 years! I'm sorry, I love Bruce Springsteen, but there is only so many times I can hear him sing Santa Claus Is Coming To Town before I want to blow my fucking brains out. Now, when I say no one has written a new Christmas song, I immediately exclude a one Maria Carey. She wrote the now famous song, "All I Want For Christmas Is You." Kudos to you, Maria. But that was probably 15 to 20 years ago now. That was also only one damn song. Where is everyone else? Even that song has become old and overplayed on the radio. As for the rest of the Christmas season, you might hear the same song 4 or 5 times in one car ride.

Now, I am not saying that the songs are not good songs, but the same songs have been redone by about 5 to 10 different artists over the past century. I am sorry, but it doesn't matter if Gene Autry is singing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer or the fucking Jonas Brothers, it is still the same damn song!

All I'm saying is that today's top artists should all get together and write a whole new Christmas album with all new Christmas songs that they wrote themselves. Then, the following year, they do the same thing. I don't care. It can be about anything. It could even be a terrible song. Just the fact that someone is actually trying to make change in the STUPID Christmas music industry.  
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