Friday, August 9, 2013


It's my favorite time of the year...


Boy, do I LOVE Shark Week on The Discovery Channel! It's almost like Christmas, only it's better because you don't have to get anyone gifts, and the holiday lasts an entire week! It's that special time of year when everyone can snuggle up on their comfy couches and watch 3,000 pound Great White Sharks rip the shit out of some seals.

Okay, so I may be over-exaggerating this a little bit. It is pretty cool, though. I would say that after the Super Bowl, this is my favorite television event. I have watched it every year ever since its beginnings. The one program that really caught my attention was the popular series called AIR JAWS! I think that is everyone's favorite program to watch during Shark Week. Since it is already Wednesday of Shark Week and they haven't shown it yet, I am going to assume that they are saving it for last. It better be impressive!

Like I said, we are about at the halfway point of Shark Week 2013, and this whole week has got me thinking: Why don't they do weeks with other animals? My friend Jenny from England brought this up to me yesterday. You see, over in the other countries, they don't get Shark Week (I know; pretty depressing, eh?). Anyways, she asked me why don't they talk about other animals? Why is Shark Week such a big deal?

Well, first of all, sharks are awesome! Second of all, I think it's because The Discovery Channel wants people to have a better understanding of sharks, particularly the Great White. They want people to realize that these animals can be dangerous, but as long as you have a general respect for them, they will leave you alone. We are in their home, and we should respect their territory. When the film Jaws was released, the Great White Shark population decreased dramatically. People were so scared, they went out in hoards and started hunting them all down. The Discovery Channel decided to make this week to try and keep these sharks protected.

But Jenny got me thinking: what other animals would make a great week of television? And so, I figured I would give you a list of my top 5 choices for animals that would make a great week of television. HERE THEY ARE:


You see, The Discovery Channel has done a lot of shows about lions. I think that you should do ALL of the big cats in the animal kingdom. Lions are not the only interesting big cat out there. You very rarely see shows about mountain lions. I think the mountain lion is my favorite big cat of them all. Then, of course, there are tigers. Tigers are always fascinating. You could also talk about cheetahs, panthers, jaguars, leopards, and bobcats. I think you could make a whole week about this. You could do slow motion video of these big cats taking down their prey. I think what would be really cool would be watching a mountain lion take down a moose. THAT WOULD BE EPIC!


I think that doing a Birds of Prey Week would really be entertaining. I would love to see a collection of Hawks and Eagles and Falcons grabbing fish out of the water. Also, you could do a program called Falcons: No Holds Barred, and it will be a collection of Falcons and Eagles and Hawks fighting with one another in mid-air! I think this would make a very entertaining week of television. With birds of prey, along with all of my other ideas, you can make the week very informative and educational, as well. I feel that doing an entire week of nature's most ferocious birds would be pretty cool.



I think that these animals would really make a very interesting week of television for The Discovery Channel. Alligator hunting seems to be a very popular trend with the television audience. So, we already know that's going to work out just fine. But no one ever does anything on snakes! I was thinking of trying to add all of these animals onto my list, but since it is only 5, I figured, "Why not just combine them all together in one week?" That is what I decided to do. I don't think I need to explain this one any further. Everybody knows deep down that this would be a great idea for a television week.


Whales are definitely a very interesting creature. Most whales are harmless, but other whales, like the Orca (or killer) Whale, are known to be extreme killers. I think that having a Whale Week on The Discovery Channel would actually be incredibly entertaining. One of the Orca's main diets is the seal, much like the shark. One of the programs that you could have could be Air Willy! I can see it now! Anyways, whales, much like sharks, are very misunderstood animals. Whales have been hunted down and killed for hundreds of years. You could do a segment on all of the old whaling communities around the world, and talk about the history of those towns and the stories that accompany them. Being able to do a full, all-inclusive, week-long study on whales would not only be informative, but also entertaining. 


I think the bear might be my favorite wild animal. It is also one of those animals that people have a lot of theories about; theories about how to avoid being attacked. A lot of people get attacked by bears all over the country, which leads a lot of people to believe that they are a dangerous. Well, they are. But if you treat them with respect, they will leave you alone. They are actually afraid of you, believe it or not. If you make a lot of noise and try to make yourself look bigger, they will actually turn around and run away. Anyways, I will let the experts tell you all the different ways to avoid getting eaten by bears when they turn this into a television series! One of the greatest things about bears is that they are one of the most ferocious beasts in the animal kingdom, but most of the time, it's pretty chill. I think my favorite bear might be either the Polar Bear or the Black Bear. Unlike sharks, they also produce really cute babies. Sharks have the unfortunate curse of looking scary. I think bears are one of the most fascinating animals in the animal kingdom, and they would make the best week of television (other than sharks) on The Discovery Channel.


Tell me what animals YOU think would make good weeks on The Discovery Channel!

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

My Top 10 Favorite Disney Movies

When I was a little kid, I used to watch all the Disney movies. I couldn't wait to get the newest Disney movie on VHS for Christmas every year. For quite a while, my family and I had quite the collection going of Disney VHS tapes. After a couple of floods in our basement, the number seemed to drop quite considerably. I still have a small collection of them somewhere, I just don't want to dig through them in my basement.

Even today, I still see as many of the new Disney movies as I can. The most recent one that I have seen was Wreck-It Ralph. Even though the film was in CG, I still really enjoyed it. I don't really care what people think. I LOVE DISNEY! I always have, and I always will.

So, in the spirit of Disney, I have compiled a list of my top 10 all-time favorite Disney movies. Now, this list will not include any Disney/Pixar film, nor will it include any live-action Disney movies. It will just strictly be the Disney animated films. So, I don't want to hear anyone complain about me not putting any Disney/Pixar films!


10.) DUMBO

This movie is a classic. It is one of Walt Disney's first films that he ever made. In fact, it was number 3. It is also one of the most clearly racist Disney films. Everyone always remembers the black crows (one of them went by the name of "Jim Crow"). That was pretty racist. But there was also that slave scene that not everyone remembers. All of these men pour out of the locomotive in the middle of the night. It is pouring rain, and they have to set up the circus tent. Well, all of the men are black and don't have faces. Then, they start singing this really racist song about being roustabouts who don't have time to read and write because they have to work. Sound racist to you? Either way, it is a really touching story about a mother elephant who wants nothing else but to be with her son, and visa-versa, and learns how to use his disability as a weapon. Who doesn't like that kind of story?

This movie is a great film about how a human boy grows up with a pack of wolves in the (African?) jungle. The film is actually an adaptation of Rudyard Kipling's popular novel. Of course, as Disney does with everything, they definitely made it suitable for children. Everybody loves the laid back, easygoing bear by the name of Baloo. His classic Disney hit, The Bear Necessities, is one of the greatest Disney songs ever written. It made you want to eat a whole bunch of prickled pears, whatever the hell those things are. I always like to try and emulate myself after Baloo. 

Peter Pan is actually my fiancee Stephanie's favorite Disney movie. Who doesn't love Peter Pan? This is ALSO a film version of a classic children's novel written by J.M. Barrie. Peter Pan is the boy who doesn't grow up because he lives in Neverland, where no one ever grows up. For some reason, he is the only one that can fly. He gets his flying ability from the fairy dust from his bitchy companion, Tinkerbell. Why he never gave any fairy dust to the rest of his lost boys was always kind of weird to me! If he did, he would have a whole army of kids who can all fly! Maybe he wanted to make sure that he would not be overthrown by any of the other Lost Boys? I don't know. Stephanie's favorite character is Wendy. She always wanted to be Wendy when she was working down in Disney. My favorite is probably Captain Hook. I liked Dustin Hoffman's version a lot better, but I liked the cartoon version too. 


I do love this movie. It is the movie that introduced Eddie Murphy to the voice acting world. Then, he started doing all the Shrek movies, and lost all of his awesomeness in my eye. Anyways, he was the best part of this movie. This movie also introduced me to Stevie Wonder. I had never heard of him before this movie. If you remember, at the end of the VHS, he sang the song "True To Your Heart" with 98 Degrees. It also introduced the world to Christina Aguilera who sang the hit song "Reflection." Of course, my favorite is "Make a Man Out of You," which was sung by none other than Donnie Osmond. It was a movie that really shed a badass light on the stereotypical "Disney Princess" (even though she wasn't really a princess).


Now, when I first started telling people that this was one of my favorites, I was met with a lot of opposition. Then I realized that all of that opposition came from the female perspective. You see, most females (most, not all) do not like this movie. When I asked my guy friends (meaning the ones who like Disney movies), they told me that they also thought that it was a good movie. I don't know what it is about this movie, but ever since I was a kid, I have always found this movie fascinating. The story of King Arthur and how he came to be brought to life by Disney. I think my favorite character is probably Archimedes, the pet owl of Merlin. 


My buddy Jed and I may have sang "Colors of the Wind" when drunk at a party one night. The weirdest thing about it was not the fact that we knew every word to the song, but the fact that we both sang with such passion in our voices because we loved the song so much! I do really like this movie. I think that it is one of those movies that was passed over because it came out the year after The Lion King, and people were still kind of getting over the amazement of that movie. I think one of the reasons for why I liked this movie so much is because it deals with American history, for which I am a huge fan of. Yes, I know that this movie is not historically accurate at all. If it were, then it Pocahontas would have been much younger, which would have made John Smith look like a total creeper. Another amazing thing about this movie it that the character of Tom, the young screw-up who shoots and kills Kocoum, Pocahontas' preordained husband, is actually voiced by none other than CHRISTIAN BALE! I know! Crazy, right?


This is one of the most under-appreciated Disney movies of all time, as well as being in my top 5. Every time I watch this movie, I get the chills. Not a lot of movies can actually do that. I also think that "Hellfire" is one of the most badass songs that Disney has ever produced. Of course it is. The entire score was written by Stephen Schwartz and Alan Menken. ENOUGH SAID! The content level is actually pretty heavy, even watching it as an adult today. I think that they did a good job with Victor Hugo's classic tale of the deformed bell ringer from Notre Dame. I think that Frollo is one of the most villainous villains that Disney has ever created. I think I've said enough about this movie. If you haven't seen it, you really should go and see it!


Of course, this movie had to be on my list. I think everyone agrees that this is definitely one of Disney's best films, although my fiancee would disagree. She thinks that the movie dates itself with all of the pop culture references that Genie makes. I think that she is probably right. I don't really think that people will remember this movie in about 20 years, nor will the newer generations appreciate it as much as I did. This movie is one of the first movies that I remember going to the movie theaters to see. I went with my Uncle Billy. He used to bring us to the movies all the time. Even to this day, I can sit and watch this movie and still laugh my ass off. I think that Robin Williams is the perfect voice actor. 


This movie is probably at the top of everyone's list when it comes to Disney movies. It may even be at the top of your list for greatest movies of all time. I mean, it is the first Disney movie that was nominated for Best Picture at the Academy Awards. It is also the only animated movie to be nominated during the time when it was only 5 movies that were nominated. That is freakin' impressive! I also have a tiny secret... Belle is my FAVORITE Disney princess. If I was a cartoon prince, I would find Belle the most attractive. I mean, she is not only pretty, but she is also extremely smart! Being smart is kind of important for me. I mean, it's a tale as old as time, bro!


Hands down, The Lion King is my favorite Disney movie of all time! I can literally watch this movie over and over again. I think this is the only Disney movie in which I know all of the lyrics to all of the songs in the movie. Not only is it my favorite Disney movie, it also has my favorite Disney song, "Be Prepared". I love this movie. This movie has also become the cause of a lot of controversy on this blog site. You see, a lot of people say that this movie is actually BASED off of William Shakespeare's famous play Hamlet. I happen to disagree. Apparently, this pisses a lot of people off. I am not changing my opinion, so stop your whining! Anyways, this movie is awesome. They tried to make a couple of sequels, but I did not see the 3rd one. I was not a big fan of the 2nd one, so I didn't want to see the 3rd. Nothing can match the awesomeness of the original. Whenever I think of the history of Disney movies, I always refer to it in my mind as movies that are made before or after The Lion King. That's how much I love this movie. 


So, there's my list. Tell me what you think on facebook, twitter, linked in, or on this very blog post!

Monday, June 10, 2013



I would just like to mention that not only is this the 50th blog post, which has been around since August of 2011, but that Stealin' The Spotlight with The Real Mike Barry has just eclipsed the 10,000 page view milestone! 

This tells me that people not only like what I am writing about, but also that they want me to write more! So, my goal now is to reach the 25,000 page view mark by the end of this summer. If my blog can reach that milestone by the end of this summer, then I will give you all a big round of applause and a figurative pat on the back (because I do not have any money to be giving out prizes and things. I'm only an actor, for pete's sake).

Keep reading, and I'll keep writing! If you have an idea of any sort that you would like me to write about this summer, or any time, then please email me at, or post a comment on THIS blog. Just as a bit of advice, if you haven't figured it out by now, I like to post about movies; just FYI.

Thank you to all of my dedicated readers out there that have been reading my blogs since the beginning. I do this for fun, and you guys make it fun to do. So, thank you!

Friday, June 7, 2013


So, as some of you may know, I work for a touring company out of Cambridge, MA called Cambridge Historical Tours. What we do is give you guided, historical tours of the town of Cambridge, and of the country's oldest college, Harvard University. What makes us special and different from all of the other tours in the area is that we are all professional storytellers. Most of us are actors that have been trained to be historians, or are historians that are trained to be actors. We know how to not only tell you the stories, but somehow get you to also experience the stories, as well. Also, the stories that we tell on our tour are not the boring ones that you learned in school. We tell only the most exciting stories on our tours! They are the stories that Harvard doesn't want you to know, or is too afraid to tell you. Also, we are the best dressed in Harvard Square. Just look at our incredible costumes:

Along with the wonderful historical tours that we give, we also do a Haunted Harvard tour, a delightfully spooky ghost tour lead by our hauntingly spirited guides around Harvard University and parts of Old Cambridge. We tell you which dormitories and class halls have been (or still are) haunted by ghosts.

We also lead spirited Pub Crawls around some of the most notable bars and pubs around Harvard Square. You get drinks and appetizers at all of our stops, along with some hilarious stories of Harvard and Cambridge old.

Why am I posting about this right now? Well, I am doing this to ask you a favor. If you read this, I could really use your help.

A local television and radio station, WGBH, is doing a contest called THE BOSTON A-LIST. There are a number of different categories to vote on. You go on the web page and vote for which company you think is the best in their respective category. The winner and finalists will be featured on WGBH throughout the year, which will eventually create more business for your company.

Well, we have made the list. We are nominated under the category of Best City Tour.

What I am asking of you is to VOTE!

Cambridge Historical Tours would greatly appreciate your vote in this competition. In our second year, we have already grown in our business more than we could have imagined. People are finally realizing what a gem this actually is. With your vote, we may see a jump in numbers for this summer on our tours, plus some well-deserved exposure. We would really appreciate the vote from you readers. We are currently in 2nd Place behind The Boston Duck Tours.

Click on this link to vote:

We thank you very much for your kind vote! If you don't think that you can vote blindly, then that is completely understandable. How do you remedy that situation? COME TAKE ONE OF OUR TOURS! We are out in Harvard Square every single day from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. We take off from right in front of the Harvard Square T-stop. We will be the ones wearing the top hats and hoop skirts. go to our web site to buy a ticket, or just come out to Harvard Square, and buy your ticket there. 

Wednesday, May 22, 2013


I have to say that this blog post comes to you with a little bit of anger and frustration.

Over my short acting career, I have gone to quite a lot of auditions; as one would do if they were an actor. Most of these auditions have been good experiences. Not only is it fun to go and audition, it is also a great opportunity to network yourself with the other auditioners (if you have read one of my past posts, then you know my opinion on that). Most of the time, the people who you are auditioning for are pretty cordial. Whether they are sincere or not, they still act as if your audition is very important. I think that this is quite important to an actor. It lets the actor know that you are at least trying to give them the time of day when they walk in the room. Often times, the director has already made his decision about casting you the second that you walk in. I'll get more into this idea in a little bit.

Now, the reason that I am so angry right now is that I just had 2 auditions in 2 consecutive nights. Here is what happened:

At the first audition (I am not going to say where), I waited around for about 3 hours to finally get seen. I walked into the room. One of the guys behind the table said, "hello," the very second that I walked in the room. Things were looking pretty good for me. I thought, "These guys seem pretty cool!" I said hello right back. I then went right over to the accompanist. We figured out how the song was going to go, and I turned to get the okay from the producers.

I saw that they were talking with each other. I waited. A good 20 seconds, I waited. I then noticed that they were not going to stop talking. I asked them, "Are you all set?" They looked up from their conversation, and one of the men said, "Ya! Sorry. Go ahead." I sang my song. I said thank you. They responded, "Ya, thanks," and they continued their conversation. I took my music, and left.


At the second audition (again, I am going to leave names out of this), I didn't have to wait as long. It was only about a 20 minute wait. I had to do a song and a monologue. They called me in. I walked into the theater. This time, I had to start the conversation on my own. I said, "Good evening!" There was a slight pause before I got a response, "hello". (This probably wasn't the correct response that they should have given, but that is not the point)

I gave my music to the accompanist. We figured out the logistics of the song together, and then I took my spot under the spotlight. I introduced myself this time. I figured that maybe it was my fault the night before that they didn't pay attention to me. I started my audition.

Now, mind you, during both of these auditions, I was really feeling it. If you are an actor, you know what I mean by that. When you have a great audition, you can just feel it.

Well, I was really feeling it during this particular audition. After my song, I noticed that they did not take their eyes up from their laptops. I started my monologue. I nailed the monologue. THEY STILL DIDN'T LOOK UP FROM THEIR LAPTOPS!


The reason for why I am posting this blog is because I want to make people aware of how insanely rude this is! I am not the only person who thinks this either. Other people with whom I have spoken to about this have also told me how insanely rude they think this is.

I understand. If you are a producer or a director, and you are running an audition all day, it can get really tiring. It can be a rather long day.

But this is your JOB. No matter how long the day can get, you need to treat every person you see with the same respect that you gave the first person that walked in the audition room. Whether you mean it or not, you need to treat the last person you see just as special as the first person you see. These actors put in the hard work to prepare for this audition. They did THEIR job. What if this is audition was something that they really needed? I know that even if I don't get cast in a show, it makes me feel better if I think that I have a chance. I'm sure that other actors definitely feel the same way.

These 2 auditions are not the only times that this has happened to me. Now, you may want to tell me, "Well, maybe you should have a better audition. MAKE them give you their attention!" I can tell you that is not the point in what I am trying to make. The point is that it should not matter how bad the audition was or is, you should still give that actor your undivided attention. Because THAT IS YOUR JOB.

I hope that if you are a director or a producer and you are reading this, you take this bit of advice to heart. Coming from an actor, we definitely notice, and we DEFINITELY don't appreciate it.

If you agree or disagree, or think that I am a jerk who needs to just shut his mouth, please let me know! I would love to hear some feedback from this, especially if you are an actor and have some other horror stories.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

My Top 10 Worst T.V. Dads

So, Father's Day is almost a month away, and I figured this would be a good time to make this list

Over the many decades that television has been around, one common theme that seems to work with television is that the family dynamic works. There must be something that people enjoy about watching other families deal with problems that may or may not ever happen to you. There have been a lot of great families that have come and gone: The Seavers, The Cleavers, The Bradys, just to name a few. These television programs have produced some pretty incredible parental units, as well.

What T.V. has also produced is some pretty terrible parental units. None more horrifying than the FATHERS.

Here is my list of the worst fathers that television has ever created:

10.) RED FORMAN, That 70's Show

For those of you that have watched That 70's Show, Red is the father of Eric and Laurie Forman, and is married to Kitty Forman. This family is the epicenter of the entire show. Red is actually one of my favorite characters from that show. His crass language and hard exterior makes for a great dynamic between him and his more loving and caring wife. He is always yelling at Eric and making fun of how weak and pathetic he thinks he is, which is why he is on my list. Back in the day, especially during the time period in which this show takes place, his behavior as a father would be considered pretty good. According to today's standards... not so much. In fact, whenever your parents start talking about how much harder life was when they were kids, and how we are SO LUCKY to have such nicer parents than theirs, Red Forman would be that parent.

9.) PHIL DUNPHY, Modern Family

Now, Phil Dunphy, by anyone's standards, is actually a pretty good father. In fact, I would be okay if he was my dad. His only problem is that he is not the brightest bulb in the circuit. His father-in-law on the show, Jay Pritchett (who is played by Ed O'Neill, who will be making his own way onto my list a little later), could be considered a bad father. If you think about it, he had to raise 2 kids all on his own after his wife left him, so he has a pardon in my book. Phil always gets himself into trouble with his crazy antics. His stupidity almost always ends up putting his family in serious trouble. He is also constantly trying to win his father-in-law's approval, but always fails miserably. That is why I consider him to be a pretty bad father.

8.) GEORGE BLUTH, SR, Arrested Development

Now, I have not seen too many episodes of Arrested Development. I don't think I need to in this case. I've seen enough episodes to make this call. George Bluth, Sr. is the father of Michael Bluth (played by Jason Bateman), and gets arrested in the first episode for embezzlement and defrauding investors as the CEO of his family's company. It doesn't really matter how much of a good father he may think he is. If you get arrested and put in jail, then you definitely deserve to be on this list. One of the other things that I have actually seen is when he promises his son the promotion to CEO of his company, and then out of nowhere, decides that he does not want to retire. That is a pretty shitty move on his part. That is why he is on my list.

7.) FRANK BARONE, Everyody Loves Raymond

HOLY CRAP! Frank was my favorite character on this show. Played by the late Peter Boyle, he would constantly be insulting his 2 sons and not caring whatsoever. His crass behavior also makes for a great dynamic with his passive-aggressive wife, Marie. I definitely compare him to Red Foreman. In fact, if you were to take Red Forman, age him several years, and put him in modern times, then you would have Frank. He was the funniest character on that show, and was the only reason for why I would watch that show.

6.) RANDY MARSH, South Park

Now, South Park is an hilarious show to begin with. Eric Cartman is one of my favorite T.V. characters of all time. My 2nd favorite character on the show, however, is Randy Marsh. Randy is probably one of the worst dad's in T.V. history. Randy, however, has gone through a makeover. When the show first started, he was not really a major character. He was mellow and actually not a terrible father, as far as that show is concerned. Over the years, however, he has been given a hilarious personality. Every time the kids get themselves involved in these crazy shenanigans, Randy also gets himself crazily involved, as well. In the more recent episodes, he has become more of a central character. He is so self-centered, he doesn't even think about his 2 kids, Stan and Shelly, when he goes off on his crazy adventures. Of course, no one on that show has any redeemable qualities, but they don't have to. It's a cartoon.

5.) HOMER SIMPSON, The Simpsons

D'OH! Of course Homer would make it on my list. It is a good thing that he is only a cartoon, because if he was to do any of the things that he does to his children in real life, he would be put in prison for the rest of his life. He neglects his 2 daughters, Maggie and Lisa, and whenever Bart pisses him off, he starts choking him with his bare hands. He is also a pretty stupid father, as well. Well, he's a pretty stupid guy, in general. Cartoons can get away with creating characters like this, though. He is definitely one of the worst fathers in T.V. history. He has been on T.V. for more than 20 years now, and who knows when they will ever get cancelled. All I know is that Homer is just a horrible father.

4.) PETER GRIFFIN, Family Guy

Now, in all fairness, if you remember from one of it's previous episodes, Peter is actually legally retarded. That right there tells you that he is not a suitable parent. It's like if you take Homer Simpson and make him a complete psychopath and retard. That is why I think he is way worse than Homer. I mean, Seth McFarlane has created a character that has no limit to what he can get away with. It has only gotten worse over the years. You could create a 10 page long grocery list of all the things that are wrong with his parenting. Whether it is blowing his entire family's life savings for his Peter-copter or Peter-dactyl, his constant bullying of his only daughter Meg, or, most recently, turning his entire family into meth addicts, Peter is one of the worst fathers I have ever seen. And he's only number 4 on my list!


LOST was one of my favorite shows of all time. All the characters were so intriguing in their own way. Charles Whidmore was no exception. Charles was one of the most ruthless men in the history of television (although later you find out he may not have been as bad afterall). I mean, this is a guy that literally did not give 2 shits about the safety of his daughter, whatsoever. He was also the sole reason for why things got so messed up on the island. He made life completely miserable for everyone that was on the island. As if they needed more shit to deal with? Also... HE ALSO HAD A SON!! Way to be there for Miles! Now he's dead, and Penny can't trust you either because you keep trying to kill Desmond. WAY TO BE!!! If you notice, he is actually the only father on my list that is NOT from a comedy.

2.) ARCHIE BUNKER, All in the Family

To be completely honest, I think I have only really seen like 3 or 4 episodes. I put him on here purely because of the reputation that he has. In those 3 or 4 episodes, I think I saw enough that I needed to see. If you want to know how bad of a father he was, watch South Park. The South Park guys, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, based the creation of their most famous character, Eric Cartman, off of Archie Bunker. They have gone on record saying that they wanted to bring an Archie Bunker-like character back to television. Cartman is one of the most irreverent characters in the history of television, so I can only imagine that Archie Bunker got way worse than just the 3 or 4 episodes that I saw. Also, if I didn't put him on my list, then I would not hear the end of it from my readers. So, that is pretty much why I just can't bump him up to the number 1 slot.

1.) AL BUNDY, Married... With Children

Al Bundy, in my opinion, is the worst father in T.V. history. He was a slob, crass, stupid, and often tried to find any opportunity to leave his family. The only pride in his life was his accomplishments on the football field at Polk High School, where he ran for 4 touchdowns in a championship game, which is still the record even to this day. Like all of the other fathers on my list, he would often make fun of his children, and because of that, they ended up becoming horrible people, as well. His daughter is a slutty dumb blonde, and his son is an immature sleazeball .. who is also a moron. I'm pretty sure he set the standard for horrible treatment to his kids. Just ask his wife Peggy, who was no angel, either. Congratulations, Al! You're constant ball scratching and neglect has landed you at the top of my list.


Now, I have not watched every television show, but of all the shows that I have watched, these are the worst fathers that I have ever seen. If you would like to add to this list, please post on the bottom and let me know.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Top 10 Favorite Alien Movies of All Time

So last night, I went to the movies (by myself, which I often do) to see the movie Dark Skies. If you are unfamiliar with the flick, it is the movie starring Kerri Russell about an alien invasion and takeover. It really wasn't a horrible movie. There were a lot of things that were very cliche about it, but overall it was okay. I thought to myself, "This isn't my favorite alien movie, but it was okay."

That got me thinking. What are my favorite alien movies? There is definitely something about alien movies that I like more than most horror and action movies. Most alien movies deal with some sort of invasion. Then, of course, there are the comedies that either deal with invasion in a funny way or try to personify aliens in some way. A lot of those movies are hit or miss with me, but there have been some pretty funny ones.

Anyway, whether it is a comedy or an action or a horror or a drama, I definitely like alien movies WAAAAAY better than I like vampire movies (which is another thing I realized the other day).

Here are my top 10 favorite alien movies of all time, and some of this list may surprise you:

10.) Alien

I have to be honest, I am not really a huge fan of the Alien franchise. I don't even think that I have seen any of the other movies, but I have seen the first one. I think that the first one of the series was actually a very good horror movie. I think that it had one of the best taglines in all of Hollywood, "In space, no one can hear you scream." I have to give this movie some props. Also, Ellen Ripley is probably the most badass female protagonists in cinematic history, right up there with Sarah Connor.

9.) Predator

Yes! Alien vs. Predator! (of course, I'm referring to the list and not the actual movie itself, because the AvP movie is not that good) It is kind of appropriate that these two movies actually faced off against each other, because that is kind of what it did in my heart when it came to this list. They battled, and Predator won. I love this movie for its awesome movie quotes. It's where we got one of Arnold's greatest lines, "GET TO THE CHOPPAH!!!"

8.) Mars Attacks

I know this may cause the world to possibly explode, but... I do not like Tim Burton. I think that he is weird just to be weird. It worked for him in his early career, but after A Nightmare Before Christmas, his weirdness just got too much for me. BUT (that's a big but), as far as alien movies go, I thought that Mars Attacks was really funny. I think that this spoof on an alien invasion is a movie that everyone should try to see at least once in their life because it is awesome. This star-studded movie is quite enjoyable.

7.) War of the Worlds

Now, I know that this movie was not well received when it first came out. Quite frankly, I'm not really sure why. I have always thought that this movie was fantastic. I really like movies where there is a global phenomenon, and everyone is effected by what was going on in the movie. I hate it when only one person or one family is effected by something that should be payed more attention to. This classic Orson Welles tale of an alien attack is actually really well done. Of course it is. It's Steven Spielberg. If you haven't seen it, you must.

6.) Men In Black

Of course this movie would make my list of top 10 alien movies. Men in Black (the first one) is really funny. This is actually one of Will Smith's first break out rolls. This movie was Will Smith before he became Will Smith. Him and Tommy Lee Jones have a hilarious dynamic in this movie, and the more and more I watch it as I get older, the more and more I grow to love it. What else is interesting about it is that it is based off of a comic book series, which I did not know until I got older. So technically, it is also a comic book movie.
5.) E.T.: The Extraterrestrial

This movie is a Hollywood classic. Everyone fell in love with ET. He is everyone's favorite alien. Everyone immediately wanted to help him when he cried out the famous line, "ET phone home," which is now one of Hollywood's greatest movie quotes of all time. Everyone also fell in love with Drew Barrymore for the first time. This movie launched her career. Steven Spielberg has made his way once again onto my list with this fantastic film. This is actually one of his best films, if you ask me. But, he makes it on the list one more time coming up. You'll see.

4.) Close Encounters of the Third Kind

Yet again, Steven Spielberg makes it onto my list. Close Encounters is such a good film. Not only is it a great alien movie, it is also a great movie period. From it's fantastic cast to its unforgettable score, this movie is definitely a must-see. No one will ever forget those unforgettable 5 notes that they play. Those notes have become household. Everyone knows where they come from. I guess Spielberg is good at doing that with his films. 

3.) Cloverfield

I absolutely LOVE this movie! I know a lot of people didn't actually see it, but you really should. It is such a cool concept for a movie, and the movie itself is actually pretty original. Plus, it was also done by the incredible director J.J. Abrams (yes, that's right. the creator of Lost). I love everything that he does. What his plan was with this film was to try and create an American version of Godzilla. I don't think that he successfully did that, but he definitely should've. Just a warning, this film is shot entirely from a first person perspective. If you get dizzy easily, then you shouldn't watch it. I personally love the first person camera angles, but that's just me. 

2.) Signs

For some reason, this movie really creeps me out! Particularly one scene more than others. In the movie, there is a scene where the local news has received coverage sent to them from some family in Mexico, where one of the aliens disrupted their kid's birthday party, and the camera shows the alien quickly walk across the screen. That was one of the creepiest moments in a movie that I have ever seen. It still creeps me out to this day. This is definitely my favorite M. Night Shyamalan movie. It is well acted by everyone in the movie, from Mel Gibson to Joaquin Phoenix. It is also the most creative alien movie that I have ever seen. I especially love how smart the movie actually is. Also, I love a good scare when I see a horror movie, and this movie definitely did that.

1.) Independence Day

If you know me, you had to have known that this was my number one alien movie. I have seen this movie so many times, I can quote it from beginning to end, pretty much. It is one of my favorite movies of all time. You may think I'm weird for loving this movie so much, but you just don't understand. It has everything you need for a movie: action, suspense, love, comedy, politics, worldwide phenomenon, explosions, an all-star cast, a great score, excellent and smart dialogue, great quotes, and incredible special effects. Not only is it the greatest alien movie I have ever seen, it is also in my top 10 favorite movies of all time (if you remember from my previous blog post)! Quite frankly, I don't really care if you think I'm weird for loving this movie so much! It's the best. I mean, where else are you going to see Jeff Goldblum save the world?

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